Being incarcerated changes a person. It makes you face who you are and the choices you have to make while serving your sentence.
Self-realisation in incarceration
The greatest self-realisation that came from my incarceration was that, when it comes to my personal experience of being incarcerated, ordinary people can find themselves behind bars. At the moment sentencing is passed, one finds oneself at a crossroads: either choosing who they will become or giving in to the system of the number gangs.
Where It started for me
As I entered Pollsmoor Correctional Facility, I knew then that I was about to change. Don’t get me wrong; I was well aware that everything the wardens were doing was simply their job. Yet standing in line, having to strip down nude and squat, and being handed a card with numbers on it was the awakening moment—I realised I would have to make decisions about the kind of person I would become while serving my sentence.
Being allocated with other inmates who had committed different crimes, I had to accept that for some inmates, it wasn’t just about serving their sentences. For some, it was about either gaining rank or recruiting other inmates into their number organisation gangs, based on whatever was deemed useful.
Some inmates even changed their sexuality due to indoctrination, while others joined gangs to make their stay easier. Then, there were those who began discovering who they truly were on a spiritual level. I found myself going through stages of learning more about myself as a person, and through programmes like Restorative Justice and a few other programmes, I found myself learning positive life lessons from unlikely people, such as fellow inmates and even the wardens.
Lessons learnt
I have learnt to accept that everyone has problems, and that knowledge is something we all possess. Even the hardest and most unlikely people have the ability to be more human than those in society who are seen to be on a higher pedestal due to financial or social status.
Every person we encounter has the same potential to commit heinous crimes. Assuming that we can pass judgment on individuals’ character based on their position or status is the mindset of a fool.
Gratitude for all encounters
I am grateful for all those I came into contact with, whether they were wardens, the civilians running the programmes we attended inside, or the hardened inmates serving long sentences and active members of the number gangs. I am thankful for the truths they shared, which placed me on the path of wanting to be part of the change needed inside and acknowledging their worth.
Should you wish to assist in the rehabilitation of former inmates and help put money into the pockets of those who have struggled to earn a living during and after incarceration, click HERE
This project in collaboration with RESTORE currently works with formerly incarcerated young men in the communities.
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